Excuses, excuses...


In the Netherlands, there is a significant and politically powerful (at least they command a lot of votes and hot air) contingent on the right that firmly believes that if shops open on a Sunday, the Wrath of all Seven Heavens will be visited upon the Fourth and Fifth Generation.

Then to the left, there’s a group of politically toothless socialist dinosaurs, desperately searching for a raison d’ĂȘtre since their political goals were achieved and surpassed 20 years ago. Equally out-of-touch with the realities of 21st Century 24/7 global retail commerce, they are resolutely convinced that anyone working on a Sunday (or more than three days a week for that matter) must be being “exploited” with a gun held to their heads.

This in spite of independent reports from supermarket managers that their (consenting adult) part-timers were eagerly queuing for double-rate Christmas Day and New Year’s Day shifts. Money rolled in all directions and the check-out queues were twice as long as usual, abundantly proving the retail trade’s main argument of “consumer demand”. Anyone who has observed how many shoppers you’ll find at 3.30 am in any 24/7 hyper in the UK wouldn’t be surprised.

When you’ve chosen to have a lazy Sunday at home, both attitudes are slightly amusing when viewed academically from the perspective of a wing-back Chesterfield. However, when you (and the weather conditions, that don’t give a jot what day of the week it is) decide to finish painting the shed and you have to drive an extra 50 kilometres to get a few dozen bolts and a tin of paint just because someone else choses to go to Church – an activity to which they are entirely welcome – it runs a bit against my democratic (and environmental) grain.

Except, when your motivation is flagging anyway and the soft winter light gives you several excuses to stop en route, which in my case follows the Noordzeekanaal. The trip there and back should not have taken more than an hour. I took me just over three!

Reasonably valid excuses follow. – AMB




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